The coach’s corner -- December 2021

Julia Rowan answers your management, leadership, and team development questions.

My team works hard and to a high standard, but a couple of people on my team turn every team meeting into a moan about the company. I’m worried that this will affect new team members. The company is a pretty decent employer. What can I do?

A. It seems that there are two issues here. First, dealing with the moaning (I will use your word here) and second, making sure that it does not affect new team members. Let’s deal with them separately.

When team members moan, our natural tendency can be to jump in, explain, defend, etc. And sometimes that may be the right thing to do, but there is often a “yes but” no-win game being played. There are a couple of things you could do. You could just listen, thank the team member and move on without comment. Or you could listen and ask, “who do you need to talk to about this?” or “who needs to know this?” Or you could have a one-to-one with the moaning team member and try to get under the issue. Only do this if you can be genuinely curious. You could ask questions like “how does that affect how you show up?” and “how can I support you here?” Many people work hard and moan hard, in which case I would praise them for working hard despite their misgivings. If you have a good conversation, you could share your concern that their negativity affects new team members.

Loud complainers can create a strong gravitational pull, and you are right to be concerned about their impact on new team members. Make sure to spend plenty of one-to-one time with the new team members, opening up a two-way dialogue, establishing a good feedback relationship, meeting with them regularly, talking about their development, etc. The manager-employee relationship is the most important relationship at work – make sure it’s a good one.

I feel my team regressed in the last work from home period. Now we’re working from home again, what can I do to hold the team together?

A. Leadership is so important when people are working remotely, as everything is moving online. Five-minute conversations in the canteen often turn into 30-minute Zoom conversations. And you only see your own team and key stakeholders, with none of that easy connection with ‘corridor friends’.

Be proactive here. Bring the team together and take some time to review the learning from the last lockdown (what worked well, what worked less well) and invite them to create a set of guidelines (sometimes called a team charter or ground rules) to help them navigate this period. Make this a live document. Check whether it is working and ask, “what else can we do to make this easier for everyone?” You can’t fix this on your own; step back so that the team can lean in.

Create a ‘social only’ meeting once a week and get it into people’s diaries. If your team is large, put people into small breakout rooms of two to four people for 15 minutes to give time for connection. If budget permits, send a small gift from time to time. One-to-one check-ins are critical too.