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How to deal with an office romance

Feb 23, 2024

Workplace romances can pose challenges for employers. From policies to breakups, Moira Grassick offers 10 tips on how to avoid and manage potential difficulties

Valentine’s Day was just a few weeks ago, but workplace romances can happen at any time of the year.

If romance blooms in your workplace, it can sometimes cause complications ranging from gossip to complaints or grievances.

Here are 10 tips to maintain control of your workplace and continue fostering a healthy and safe environment for your staff when dealing with an office romance.

1. Check your existing policies and procedures

Are your existing policies and procedures appropriate for dealing with any problems that might arise as a result of workplace romances?

It’s sensible to have either a confidentiality policy or conflict of interest policy in place, requiring employees to notify you of any change in their personal circumstances that might give rise to a conflict of interest.

2. Encourage staff to notify management of a workplace romance

Requesting that employees notify management about their love life might seem awkward or over the top, but it is important that management be aware of any romantic relationship in the workplace. Then, they can decide if appropriate steps need to be taken.

3. Don’t ignore a workplace romance

Not every employee will be comfortable reporting their new relationship. It could become known to management by other means that a personal, romantic relationship between staff members has developed. It’s best not to ignore this information and proceed as you would if you had learned about the relationship from the people involved.

4. Think about changing the work environment

It is sensible to consider whether the reporting structures within teams need to be revised. Changes like these must be discussed with the people affected.

Reassessing reporting structures in the case of a workplace romance, especially if management is one of the parties involved, can help allay any suspicion of favouritism that might arise at a future date.

5. Beware of favouritism

Ensure that staff engaged in relationships with a colleague are not involved in any management decisions involving their partners.

It is important that management decisions are taken impartially and that the impartiality of the decision is clear to everyone involved.

6. Don’t be afraid to take action

Treat any complaints from staff members – involved in the relationship or not – seriously.

If people are witness to, or experience, inappropriate behaviour in the workplace, it is an employer's responsibility to manage it.

7. Training management

Most managers lack training and knowledge on how to tackle romantic relationships at work. Managers need to be aware of how to manage such situations, what the potential risks are and how to manage these risks.

Managers should also have regular training on how to respond to harassment complaints that may arise as a result of a romantic relationships at work, or its aftermath.

8. Social events

Christmas parties or work social events are often the source of workplace romances. It’s a good idea to remind staff that they are still expected to abide by company policies, even if the party is outside of the workplace. If something goes wrong, you, as an employer, could be liable.

9. Breakups

Of course, not all love is made to last.

Problems might arise if a workplace romantic relationship ends, especially if it doesn’t end smoothly.

These situations could impact an employee's work performance or professional relationships. This might require thinking about moving the staff members involved.

10. Obligation to maintain a safe workplace

Sexual harassment and bullying can often arise in the context of workplace romances.

Employers should have policies and procedures in place to deal with any such incidents and related complaints.

Love may be in the air, but it doesn’t have to poison the workplace. Be proactive, set expectations around conduct and enforce your workplace policies.

Moira Grassick is Chief Operating Officer at Peninsula Ireland

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