Failure is hard to take, but with the right mindset you can learn how to make the best of it. Edel Walsh explains
Doing poorly on your exams is difficult. Instead of being demotivated and giving up, however, take what you have learned from the experience and use it to guide your next steps.
Your initial reaction
You will no doubt experience a range of emotions after finding out you have failed an exam. You may be shocked, angry, resigned, or sad. It can be tempting to try to bury or deny these feelings, but instead, sit with them for a while and allow yourself time to fully embrace them.
Think about strategies or techniques that have worked for you in the past when getting disappointing news. It can be helpful to talk with someone, be that a family member, a close friend, or a colleague. Share how you are feeling.
Treat yourself kindly
Be aware of how you talk to yourself after failing an exam. What is your internal dialogue? What are you telling yourself?
Most people are quite harsh with themselves, using negative thoughts such as “I’m not intelligent enough” or “everyone else is better than me”. This negative self-talk is detrimental to your mental well-being – if you are constantly putting yourself down, you’ll eventually believe it. Remember, it is your words that steer your thinking process.
If you notice that you’ve fallen into a negative ‘thinking trap’, a good idea is to write down what you’re thinking and then look at re-framing it in a positive way.
For example: “Everyone else is better than me” can be re-framed to “what can I learn from students who passed these exams?” Similarly, “I am not intelligent enough” can be re-framed as “what are my strengths that will help me succeed in these exams the next time?”
Control, influence and accept
Having failed your exams, it is useful to consider what you can control, influence, and accept.
It may take some time, but a good place to start is to accept what has happened. There is no changing the past.
Next, consider what is in your control. You can control your attitude and behaviours—what you do next is within your control; how you approach your repeat exams is also within your control.
Some self-reflecting questions to ask yourself are:
- What are the issues or elements of the situation you can control?
- What can you do about this?
- Who can support you with this?
Finally, consider what or who you can influence to support you with repeating your exams:
- What influence do you have?
- What are the elements of this situation you can't control, but you can influence?
- If you have control and/or influence, what action can you take?
Be open to changing your approach
Once the dust has settled and you are ready to start preparing for your repeat exams, take time to reflect on your past exam preparation and performance.
Self-reflecting helps you consider what worked well for you in the exam process and what needs to be changed. Have a look at the article “Reflecting on Exam Performance” in the September 2022 issue of The Bottom Line for further advice on this.
Consider changing your approach to study rather than using the same approach again and expecting different results. For example, when I ask students the reasons they think they failed their exams, often they say they did not practice enough exam questions, or they left practicing questions too late.
It is essential to start practicing exam questions from the outset. By putting in the practice, you will get a good understanding of what topics you know well and what requires more work.
If you are not open to alternative approaches, you can get stuck in the failure loop. The popular maxim—“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”—is relevant here.
Reflect on your goals
Failing exams is upsetting, but you will learn and grow from the experience. Consider the goals you set for yourself when you started out on the journey to becoming a Chartered Accountant:
- Why is this goal so important to you?
- What are your unique strengths that will help you reach your goal?
Reflect on these goals and keep them at the forefront to remind yourself why you’re doing this in the first place.
Moving forward
It’s important to be aware of negative self-talk and re-frame this dialogue into positive prompts. Think about what you can control, influence, and accept about the situation and be open to changing your approach.
Edel Walsh (edel@edelwalsh.ie) is an academic performance coach