In this article, the Thrive Wellbeing Hub looks at an epidemic that Ireland is facing and that is high levels of loneliness.
Many of us feel lonely from time to time. However, everyone’s experience of loneliness is different and personal. It is widely believed those who experience loneliness are those who may live alone or don’t have many friends or family around. Conversely, you can have lots of social connections, support and contact but still feel like you are alone.
Loneliness can be compounded by stigma, but it is an epidemic and levels are prevalent, especially here in Ireland. A survey carried out by the European Commission’s Joint Research Centre (JRC) reported Ireland has the highest levels of loneliness in Europe with over 20% of respondents reporting feeling lonely. Another research report by Irish Life found that more than one in three adults in Ireland would describe themselves as lonely or isolated.
Other studies and research have linked loneliness and isolation with serious health and wellbeing impacts. It has been suggested isolation;
- Increases the risk for all causes of premature death – rivalling smoking, obesity and inactivity.
- Increases the risk of dementia by 50%.
- Increases the risk of heart disease and stroke by 29% and 32% respectively.
- Associated with higher rates of depression anxiety and suicide.
Quality over Quantity
Loneliness is a state of distress where there is a gap in desire for social connection and actual experiences of it. Humans are inherently social creatures that benefit greatly from quality relationships that make us feel safe, valued and feed our sense of purpose. Depending on your personality, the amount of social interaction needed varies from person to person.
Loneliness is linked to the quality of relationships as opposed to the number of relationships. A lack of authenticity in our relationships can feed feelings of loneliness and even those in relationships, those with large friend groups or surrounded by people daily can experience deep, heartbreaking loneliness.
Certain times or life events can also affect our levels of loneliness and isolation. For example, feeling lonely around Christmas or Valentine’s Day, or missing someone after a bereavement.
A common measure for loneliness is the UCLA loneliness scale which asks individuals how often they feel the following
- Feel they lack companionship
- Feel left out
- Feel in tune with the people around them
- Feel outgoing and friendly
- Feel that there are people they can turn to
Dealing with it
While an easy fix may seem elusive, there are lots of ways to deal with loneliness and isolation. A major hindrance in treating loneliness is many may feel reluctant to even acknowledge it or how it affects them.
Feel the feelings
It is important to know loneliness is a totally normal characteristic of life and it doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you. Everyone goes through lonely periods and feelings of isolation often come and go. Accept that you feel lonely presently and that is okay, and that there will be times when you don’t feel this way. It’s also important to remember you’re not the only person to feel this way. Sometimes, there is a comfort in knowing you’re not alone in your loneliness.
Talk it out
It is a difficult situation to open up about but there is no shame in feeling lonely. Finding someone to speak and open up to can really help in so many ways.
It could be that you need or would prefer to talk to a professional – there are plenty of support services out there including the mental health support from Thrive which includes counselling and coaching.
Company of 1
There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely. Improving your relationship with yourself can help tremendously in combating feelings of loneliness. Use alone time to get in touch with yourself and to feel more comfortable with just yourself for company. Spending time alone can be liberating and can be a great way to wind down. You have the power to be your own best friend and liking your own company is a step towards better confidence.
Distract
Keeping yourself busy is a great way to improve your feelings of loneliness. Starting a hobby or delving into your interests can help you to feel less alone and a way to pass the time.
It also allows room for connection if in a group setting and volunteering can help strengthen your sense of purpose and meaning. Always wanted to learn a new language? This could be the perfect time to commit.
The Thrive Wellbeing Hub has many supports in place to help you tackle difficult feelings whether it loneliness or other emotional distress. Take a look at the supports we provide. You can contact the thrive wellbeing team by email at: thrive@charteredaccountants.ie or by phone: (+353) 86 0243294
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