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How to Deal with a Difficult Manager at Work

According to a Forbes article, 69% of people said their manager impacts their mental health more than their therapist or doctor—and it’s equal to that of their partner. Further research from Gallup identifies management style as the second leading cause of work-related stress absence. If you’re struggling with a difficult manager, it's important to understand how to effectively navigate the situation.    Understand what’s driving their behaviour Managers can act difficult for a variety of reasons, many of which may have nothing to do with you. They may be stressed, lack proper training, have challenging personality traits or may have other personal issues. Recognising this can help you avoid taking their behaviour personally and cultivate empathy. While constructive feedback and direction are a normal part of any job, if your manager is delivering this in a harsh or unhelpful manner, it is more likely a reflection of their internal struggles or skill gaps than your performance. Regulate your own emotions and behaviour Dealing with a difficult manager can be incredibly stressful, often taking a toll on your self-esteem. It’s important to prioritise self-care and process these difficult emotions. Techniques such as breathwork, meditation, journaling, practicing self-compassion and grounding exercises can help you stay calm and avoid reacting impulsively to their behaviour. It is also important to reflect on your own actions—are there any behaviours or responses on your part that might be contributing to the tension? Being self-aware can help you navigate the situation more effectively. Communicate your concerns It is important to remember that no one is a mind reader. Although we might expect our manager to know what to do or not do, it is crucial to communicate your concerns openly and professionally, rather than letting frustrations build up. While preparing for this conversation: - Provide specific examples of the issues you are facing rather than vague complaints. - Focus on the behaviour rather than making it personal. Avoid placing blame or statements like ‘you’re too critical’ and instead use ‘I’ statements such as ‘I noticed that I received a lot of detailed feedback on my last three reports.’ - Be clear on the impact it is having on your work and your mental health, for example, ‘It’s making it difficult for me to feel confident in my work, and it’s starting to affect my motivation and self-esteem.’ - Offer solutions to improve the situation rather than just pointing out problems for example, ‘Could we balance detailed feedback with what’s working well, so I can improve more effectively?.’ - Ask for feedback and be open to hearing their perspective on the situation, for example, ‘I’d like to get your perspective on the situation and how we can improve it going forward.’ Seek Support A problem shared is a problem halved. When dealing with a difficult manager, it is vital to have a support network. Trying opening up to a trusted family member, friend or colleague that can listen or give you impartial advice. If your entire team are struggling with the same issue, consider discussing the issue collectively. Having addressed the issue with your manager without seeing any progress, it may be time to escalate the situation to their manager or HR, either informally or through formal channels. If you’ve exhausted all options and you are still struggling, it may be worth considering whether the role or team is the right fit for you in the long term, or if exploring new opportunities could offer a better environment. Written by Gillian Bane on behalf of Thrive.  If you are struggling with the impacts of work-related issues, Thrive is here to help. Thrive is the Institute's dedicated wellbeing hub that offers free wellbeing support to members and students. Contact the team by email at: thrive@charteredaccountants.ie  or by phone: (+353) 86 0243294.  Gillian Bane is a chartered accountant and workplace health and wellbeing consultant who specialises in manager and leadership training. You can find more information on her website www.wellwork360.com.

Oct 10, 2024
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Feeling drained? Avoid these energy zappers at work

Do you find yourself constantly feeling drained by the end of the workday? You’re not alone. Many people struggle with maintaining their energy levels at work, often due to habits and practices that can be adjusted. Here are four things you can avoid to help you feel more energised throughout your workday. Always Being “On” Between back-to-back meetings, an overflowing inbox and a constantly ringing phone it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. However, research shows that multitasking, or task switching, can cost up to 40% productivity. To combat this, block out specific times in your diary to tackle different tasks and stick to your schedule as much as possible. Minimise email notifications during focused work periods and consider setting ground rules with your team about when and how to communicate more effectively. Not Taking Breaks More and more people are skipping lunch and eating at their desk for multiple reasons - it’s the cultural norm, perceived work pressures or a desire to finish early. However, breaks are essential for recharging your energy. Make it a priority to block out your lunch break on your calendar and avoid eating at your desk. Furthermore, taking short microbreaks throughout the day have been proven to reduce stress and boost productivity. Overworking While busy times may sometimes require late nights, it is important to distinguish between hardworking and overworking. Hard work means achieving your goals through sustainable efforts, balancing productivity, achievement and well-being. However overworking means pushing yourself beyond healthy limits. Working extra hours or taking on too much work is often driven by fear of failure, work demands or a need to prove oneself. Reflect on what is driving your work habits and set boundaries with both yourself and others. Keeping Things Bottled Up Whether it’s frustration with a colleague or struggling to admit to your manager that you’re feeling overwhelmed, keeping your emotions bottled up can drain your energy. There are various reasons why we don’t feel comfortable opening up – culture, stigma and fear of negative consequences. However, a problem shared is a problem halved, so try expressing your feelings to your manager, co-worker or a trusted friend. Journaling can also be an effective way to process your thoughts and emotions. Feeling drained at work does not have to be the norm. By avoiding these pitfalls, you can create a healthier and more sustainable work routine. To learn more about this topic, you can attend Thrive and the ACA Professionals upcoming webinar ‘Managing your energy for better balance’ on Wednesday 11th September. See link to register below. https://bit.ly/3SXZ40j Written by: Gillian Bane, chartered accountant and workplace health and wellbeing consultant. You can find more information on her website www.wellwork360.com

Aug 28, 2024
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The role of mindfulness in enhancing workplace creativity: A cultural perspective

Practices, such as meditation and mindful breathing, help individuals regulate their attention and emotions. This regulation leads to a balanced mental state, allowing for greater cognitive flexibility and creative problem-solving. Cognitive psychology suggests that a calm and focused mind is better equipped to generate innovative ideas. Chronic stress impedes creative thinking by limiting cognitive resources. Mindfulness reduces stress by promoting relaxation and fostering a positive mental state has shown that lower stress levels correlate with higher creative output, as individuals are more open to exploring new ideas and taking risks. Enhancing interpersonal relationships Mindfulness enhances empathy and communication skills, which are crucial for effective teamwork. A theory that puts this into practice and provided evidence-based research is the social exchange theory, positive interactions between colleagues builds trust and cooperation, creating an environment where creative ideas can flourish. By fostering better relationships, mindfulness contributes to a supportive and collaborative workplace culture. A mindful workplace culture encourages openness and reduces fear of judgment, which are essential for creativity. Organisational behaviour theories highlight the importance of a positive organisational culture in promoting innovation. When employees feel safe to express their ideas without fear of criticism, they are more likely to think outside the box and contribute creative solutions. Inclusivity and diversity Mindfulness practices can also promote inclusivity and respect for diversity, further enhancing creativity. By encouraging non-judgmental awareness and acceptance, mindfulness helps create a culture where diverse perspectives are valued. This inclusivity leads to a richer pool of ideas and innovative solutions. Mindfulness training programs Many organisations have successfully implemented mindfulness training programs to enhance employee wellbeing and creativity. These programs typically include guided meditation sessions, mindfulness workshops, and ongoing practice support. Case studies from various industries demonstrate the positive impact of such programs on both individual and organisational performance. Beyond training programs, integrating mindfulness into the organisational culture is crucial. This can be achieved through leadership commitment, regular mindfulness practices, and creating spaces for reflection and meditation. By embedding mindfulness into the company’s values and practices, organisations organisations can sustain a culture that supports creativity. Measurement and evaluation To assess the effectiveness of mindfulness initiatives, organisations can employ both qualitative and quantitative research methods. Surveys, interviews, and creativity assessments can provide valuable insights into how mindfulness practices influence employee creativity. Social sciences methodologies, such as thematic analysis and statistical modelling, are useful tools for evaluating these outcomes. New areas of study The intersection of mindfulness and workplace creativity presents numerous opportunities for further research. Future studies could explore the long-term effects of mindfulness on creativity, the role of individual differences, and the impact of organisational context. Interdisciplinary research, combining insights from psychology, sociology, and organisational behaviour, can provide a comprehensive understanding of these phenomena. Practical benefits Understanding the social sciences perspective on mindfulness and creativity offers practical benefits for businesses and employees. Organisations can leverage this knowledge to design effective wellbeing programs and foster a mindful and creative workplace that not only enhance employee satisfaction but also drive innovation.  This article was written by the Institute's DCU Intern, Jennifer Lukikeba, on behalf of Thrive.  In partnership with DCU's Access to the Workplace programme, the Institute hosted Jennifer as part of its professional summer internship placements.  For more advice or information, contact the team by email at: thrive@charteredaccountants.ie  or by phone: (+353) 86 0243294.   

Aug 15, 2024
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Practicing the art of self-compassion

Swapping self-criticism for self-compassion can help us to become more resilient, overcome difficult situations and boost our mental health. Dee France, Thrive’s Wellbeing Lead, explains why. “You are your own worst critic” is a popular phrase for a reason and will resonate with many of us. Our inner critic can be very harsh, and while we shouldn’t outright ignore it, we also shouldn’t give it more attention than it deserves. In fact, it could be argued that a healthy dose of self-doubt and criticism is necessary as it allows us to monitor our behaviour and check ourselves. However, overwhelming negative self-talk and being too critical of oneself can be damaging and detrimental to how we live our daily lives, not to mention the devastating impact it can have on our mental health. This is where a level of self-compassion is needed. Humans are collectively compassionate beings, showing a great deal of understanding and kindness to others, but we aren’t always great at being kind to ourselves. Where self-criticism asks, “am I good enough?” self-compassion asks, “what’s good for me?” Instead of dwelling on mistakes, past failures and judging and criticising yourself for various imperfections or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are understanding and supportive of yourself. How do we develop self-compassion? Like any skill, developing a sense of self-compassion requires time, practice and patience. As a leading researcher in self-compassion, Doctor Kristin Neff theorises that there are three core fundamentals to self-compassion. Mindful awareness This involves being aware of your thoughts and emotions and taking a balanced and mindful approach to both, neither suppressing nor exaggerating, but simply acknowledging your feelings without judgment. Self-kindness This involves caring for yourself the way you would a friend or family member going through a difficult time. When we are faced with challenging situations or have feelings of inadequacy, rather than beating ourselves up, we are instead supportive and encouraging of ourselves. Self-kindness gives us the security and perspective to put ourselves in a better frame of mind to cope with any challenges we may experience. Common humanity Self-compassion is rooted in common humanity. When we make a mistake, it is common to think we are the only person in the world who is flawed. Common humanity is recognising that everyone is flawed, vulnerable and imperfect. It is important to acknowledge that we all make mistakes and have our own insecurities. Nobody is perfect and this is something that connects, rather than separates, us. Self-compassion and wellbeing Self-compassion can be thought of as being self-indulgent or feeling sorry for ourselves, but developing the ability to cope and manage our difficulties is good for our emotional wellbeing. Research studies show that those who are more self-compassionate benefit from better mental and physical health. Further, people with higher levels of self-compassion tend to be more resilient, have a less physical response to stressors and spend less time dwelling on situations after they have happened. Self-compassion involves recognising strengths and achievements, which, in turn, boosts our self-confidence and self-belief. A study by the Universities of Exeter and Oxford found that self-compassion can immediately calm your heart rate and lessen stress responses. Study participants also demonstrated a general state of relaxation and security and reported a stronger sense of connection to other people. Exercising self-compassion makes you more likely to: engage in healthy behaviours such as exercise, eating better and better sleeping patterns; be less fearful of making mistakes, rejection or change; display higher levels of emotional intelligence, happiness and optimism; handle and cope with adversity and difficulties better; and demonstrate healthier boundaries in both your professional and personal life. Practising self-compassion There is a vast array of ways we can cultivate self-compassion. To get started, there are plenty of helpful resources, tools, exercises and templates available online. Below are a few ways you can start showing yourself a little more kindness and understanding: Practice mindfulness and self-reflection: learn to observe and evaluate your thoughts; activities such as journalling and meditation can aid this. This encourages you to be curious and self-aware, understanding that your thoughts and assumptions are just that – they are not facts. Reward and celebrate: celebrate your successes and achievements. Practice gratitude and celebrate moments of positivity and kindness. Keep a list of personal strengths to review in moments of self-doubt. Take a break: time away from your day-to-day routine and a change of scenery can help you keep things in perspective. Strengthen your connections: kindness is contagious! Showing love and understanding to the people around you means you are more likely to show yourself the same compassion. Do things you enjoy: spending time on our passions, hobbies and interests is good for the soul and brings a sense of satisfaction and achievement. Thrive is the Institute’s dedicated wellbeing hub that offers confidential wellbeing support to students and members. For more advice or information, check out Thrive’s Wellbeing Hub. Alternatively, you can contact the team by email at thrive@charteredaccountants.ie or phone at (+353) 86 024 3294.

Jul 01, 2024
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Five ways to wellbeing

The Five Ways to Wellbeing was developed by the New Economics Foundation in 2008, where their project collated research from around the world on proven actions that can help us feel good. Wellbeing is a term that has gained popularity in recent years but in its simplest form it is a state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy. In a broader sense, it’s how satisfied you are with life, your sense of purpose, and how in control you feel. The framework is used globally in various ways to build more awareness on our collective wellbeing and help people take action to improve it. Each action can make a positive impact in our lives and most of us will engage with these activities without being aware of it. To get the most from the five steps, it is important to incorporate all of them on a daily basis. Why not try the five today? Connect Social connection is extremely important for our wellbeing. We are social animals, and our need for connection can help us feel happier, increase our feelings of security and safety and gives us a greater sense of belonging and purpose. Make time to connect with others each day. Nurture and invest in your relationships with loved ones.  This could be talking to someone rather than sending an email, speaking to someone new - possibly chatting to another in your local coffee shop or supermarket or taking time out to ask a loved one how they are truly feeling. Be Active Look for ways to be active each day. This doesn’t mean spending hours in the gym though; find an activity you can enjoy and try to incorporate it into your everyday life. Physical activity is intrinsically linked with lower rates of depression and anxiety. Why not take the stairs rather than the lift, go for a walk at lunch, or explore your local park – little changes can reap huge rewards. Take Notice Simply put, be in the moment. Being aware of the now can help you feel calmer and reduce stress. Take stock of what is around you and paying attention to the present – to your own thoughts, feelings and to the world around you. Keep Learning Be curious and ever learning! Continuing to learn throughout life can help boost our self-confidence and self-esteem. As adults, we can be time poor with other day-to-day responsibilities but simple activities such as learning a new recipe, getting around to that DIY project, doing a puzzle or setting yourself a new challenge can help achieve a higher level of wellbeing. Give Giving to others makes us feel good. When we give or help others, it activates parts of the brain associated with trust, social connection and pleasure. It provides a sense of meaning, improves our life satisfaction and mood, and can even reduce stress. Giving up your time to others can also help strengthen relationships or build new ones. Try to complete a small act of kindness today. Research into actions for improving happiness has shown that committing an act of kindness once a week over a six-week period is associated with an increase in wellbeing. And there you have it, the five ways to wellbeing! If you are struggling with your mental or emotional wellbeing, Thrive can help you on your journey to better emotional health. For wellbeing advice, contact the team by email at: thrive@charteredaccountants.ie or by phone: (+353) 86 0243294.

Jun 21, 2024
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Instant ways to boost your mood and spirit

Bad days happen. We all have them, those days when we feel a bit down or low and nothing seems to go our way. It’s normal to have a few down days every now and then but you don’t have to resign yourself to a bad day or let a bad mood dominate you. Here the Thrive wellbeing team shares some quick strategies for an instant lift in mood and help put a smile on your face.  Understand and observe your mood To manage our mood, we need to observe them and understand why we are feeling that way. If you are having a bad day, take note of your feelings – are you feeling sad, angry, frustrated?  Reflect on what happened that led you to feel like this and whether the day got worse or better. Observe where your mood is steering you and tell yourself that you can master and control your mood. Music Listening to music can have a major impact on how you are feeling. Research shows that music can influence our emotions as it can boost the production of dopamine and serotonin in the brain, which evokes feelings of happiness, relaxes the mind and body, and relieves stress. There are countless mood-boosting playlists on Spotify if you are looking for inspiration. Move Endorphins trigger a positive feeling in the body which helps instantly boost your mood. So, get those endorphins pumping by engaging in some movement – dance, shake your body, do some jumping jacks, or get outside for a walk. Any movement will help lift your mood and calm you down. Smile It sounds cheesy but it is amazing what smiling can do. Research has indicated that the simple act of smiling activates mood-boosting hormones and can literally ‘trick’ your brain into a state of happiness and improve your positivity. It can even boost your immune system. This applies to genuine and not-so-genuine smiles, so fake it ‘til you make it!  Release the emotions Suppressing or holding onto your emotions can lead to further negative thinking, it can even lead to physical stress on the body. So, it is always best to let it out. If you feel sad, allow yourself to cry. Feeling angry, scream. Feeling overwhelmed, mediate. Whatever outlet you choose, it is important to release the emotion and let go of the negative energy. Do something new Routine is good for us but switching it up from time to time and adding something that is out of the norm for us can really brighten up a day. Studies suggest that those who engage in a variety of experiences are more likely to retain positive emotions. Try a different coffee order, add a pastry with it, take a different route home, go to the cinema or even wear something you wouldn’t normally wear. Anything that challenges our routine a little will give you a lift. Do something nice for someone else A quick good deed or small act of kindness can go a long way to helping us feel more positive. Taking the focus away from yourself and doing something nice for someone else can make your feel good and instantly boost your happiness. Good Company Having a conversation with a friend or loved one is another great way to combat a low mood. Vent if you need to, as sharing can make you feel better and take the weight out of your feelings. A fun, light-hearted conversation will help put a smile on your and take your mind away from whatever is causing a low mood. If you find a low mood is persistent and impacting your day-to-day, you may consider seeking support. The Thrive Wellbeing Hub offers confidential wellbeing support such as a one-to-one listening service, wellbeing coaching, and professional counselling.   We also host a wealth of insightful and practical wellbeing webinars that may help you in your efforts, you can visit our Help & Guides page to view. For more advice, contact the team by email at: thrive@charteredaccountants.ie  or by phone: (+353) 86 0243294.

Jun 21, 2024
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