Retirement

Retirement is one of the biggest transitional periods than anyone can go through with almost every aspect of our life changing. Suddenly you are met with a massive shift in your pace of lifestyle. While many of us may embrace the change, retirement can be a time of great upheaval physically and emotionally.  With this in mind, it is important to plan and prepare for the change ahead as you embark on this transitional life stage.  A long and fulfilling retirement isn’t just about a pension plan, it also about planning for your lifestyle shift. Without a plan in place, the initial novelty of retirement can wear off pretty quickly, leaving you to struggle to adapt to your new way of life.  Routine & schedule Adjusting to retired life is not something that happens overnight, and it may take a while to adapt. So do try to remember that like any big change in life, it'll take time for you to become accustomed to what comes with retirement. When working we have an imposed schedule and structure but once the 9 to 5 comes to an end, it can be incredibly difficult to fill all the extra hours you now have at your disposal. Across all stages in life, structure and routine are key habits that lead to good wellbeing. It may be tempting to fill your days with laze and leisure which is novel and exciting at first, but feelings of boredom or restlessness can creep in especially if you have been used to a busy schedule. You may want to define some specific routines to maintain order, predictability, and structure. In the run up to your retirement, take some time to consider what your day, week or month will look like. Stay active Staying active through exercise will help keep you healthy both physically and mentally and prolong your life. But it is also important to keep your mind active too. Ongoing learning can help keep you mentally sharp by getting you in the habit of staying mentally active. Having less structured days allows you to take up a new hobby or learn skills and feeds into the need for routine and schedule. Retirement is a great time to discover old and new passions that you felt you didn’t have the time for before.  Taking up a course or classes in your local college, learning to play an instrument, or another meaningful activity that you can enjoy and engage with can keep you mentally fit. The mantra ‘use it or lose it’ most definitely applies here! Connection As we transition from the workforce, our social circle can diminish due to our daily interactions reducing and unfortunately loneliness becomes more common as we get older. Loneliness has a detrimental impact on our health and wellbeing and may significantly increase the chances of poor health. Research found that older adults with a good social life tend to live longer than those who are more isolated and happier retirees were found to have more social interactions. So, whether you are married or single, an introvert or an extrovert, maintaining strong social connections is critical. It is important to keep in contact with friends and connect with your work circle as much as possible. Certain activities can also present opportunities for you to meet new friends or other retirees with similar interests. Taking a new class, joining a book club, participating in your local community centre, or joining an exercise group are just some of the many ways you can stay connected. There is also a wealth of benefits from spending time with grandchildren, it helps you to keep active, improves cognitive skills and can lower the risk of depression. Purpose For many, our sense of purpose can be wrap in what we do for living and measure our success only through our professional lives. Once we leave the workplace, there may be a need to find meaning to fill that void and reinvent your purpose in life. Outside of your profession, try and identify what gives your life meaning and purpose and makes you happy. Retirees have a unique insight and wisdom gained from a lifetime's worth of skills, expertise and competencies that could be of benefit elsewhere and this could mean using talents in service to others. Mentoring and volunteering are fulfilling paths for retirees. Retirees can gain meaningfulness and social and emotional benefits from mentoring and volunteering. But whatever you do in retirement it is important to see this time as an opportunity to live out the second half of your life purposefully.

According to a long-term study by experts at Harvard University, fame and fortune aren’t what keep us happy. Indeed, tens of thousands of pages of information generated by the study suggest that good relationships are crucial, not just for happiness but for our health too. The study also shows how damaging loneliness can be to your overall wellbeing. Those taking part in the study who were more isolated than they wanted to be were less happy, and their health declined earlier in mid life than those who had good social connections. Isolated people, the study suggests, also live shorter lives than those who aren’t lonely. This isn’t the first piece of research to confirm a link between social support and health. Some studies claim having good relationships could make you up to 50% more likely to live a long and healthy life, compared with someone who is isolated. Loneliness isn’t just something that affects older people. But many people find it more difficult to make and maintain new relationships in later life than when they were young. So here are some tips on how to meet new people and make friends in your 50s, 60s, 70s and beyond… Don’t be embarrassed There’s no shame in being lonely, and you’re certainly won’t be the only person who feels isolated. So don’t let embarrassment stop you from doing something about it. You may feel uncomfortable about meeting new people at first. But ask yourself this question: what’s the worst that could happen? If you’re not used to doing much socialising, reaching out to people you don’t know may feel like a risk. But take the plunge and it’s very likely that you’ll discover others feel exactly the same as you do. Meet your neighbours Years ago most people lived in communities where everyone would be on 1st name terms with everyone living around them. These days, you’re lucky if you know who your next-door neighbour is. But being part of a local community is a good way to meet people in your area and may help you feel less isolated. If you don’t know who lives next door, say ‘good day’ to your neighbour next time you see them. Give them a smile whenever you see them, and you’ll soon find an opportunity to start chatting. Once you start getting to know them, invite your neighbours around for a cup of tea on a regular basis. If you already know your next-door neighbours, try to get acquainted with others further down the street to widen your local social circle, and look out for local community groups you could join, such as residents’ associations. Share your interests There are also lots of other groups you could join that may allow you to pursue your hobbies and passions and connect with others at the same time. If you like reading, why not join a near-by book club or reading group? Or if you’re fond of the great outdoors, look for a Ramblers walking group in your local area (visit theramblers.ie). Another website that could help you find a group that shares your interests is meetup.com – just type in your location and choose the subject you’re interested in to find the nearest groups in your area. Meetup groups cater for all tastes and ages, so depending on where you live you’re almost certain to find one you could try. Walk a dog Anyone who has ever walked a dog regularly knows how easy it is to strike up conversations and acquaintances with other dog owners. There’s something about the shared interest of having a pet that makes it easy to talk to a complete stranger who you normally wouldn’t dream of approaching. If you don’t have a dog, you might want to think about offering to walk one for a friend or neighbour. Alternatively, you could consider volunteering as a dog walker at your local animal shelter or join Borrow My Doggy, a website that matches dog owners with local people who can take them for walks and look after them when their owners are away. Do good deeds If you have some spare time on your hands, you may want to think about doing some voluntary work. There are always lots of different organisations that need people to help out, such as local hospitals, schools, churches and a host of different charities. And not only will volunteering get you out and about and meeting people, it will help to boost your self esteem too. Ask for details of groups that need volunteers at your local library, or visit volunteer.ie to find volunteering opportunities in your area. Connect with old friends If you’ve lost touch with friends from the past, you may be amazed at how easy it can be to discover them on social media websites such as Facebook. People of all ages use Facebook to keep in touch with what friends and family members are up to. Social networking is increasingly used by the older generations. So think about giving it a try if you haven’t already done so. Pick up the phone If the idea of signing up to a social media network doesn’t appeal to you, there’s always the telephone. It’s a great tool for getting in touch with people you haven’t spoken to in a while. And who knows, you may make someone’s day by giving them a call. Article reproduced with the kind permission of CABA, the organisation providing lifelong support to ICAEW members, ACA students and their close family around the world.

Many parents feel mixed emotions when their child starts university. If your child is about to leave home for a new life as a student, you'll no doubt feel happy that they're embarking on an exciting new venture. At the same time, you may also be feeling a sense of sadness. These mixed feelings are common and you may be experiencing something called ‘empty nest syndrome'. What is empty nest syndrome? Empty nest syndrome is a term coined to describe the feelings of loneliness and sadness some parents experience when their children grow up and leave home. Some common emotions you may experience include: Feelings of sadness, loss or grief Feeling like you have a lack of purpose Having a sense of loneliness Being worried about your child's safety or ability to look after themselves Empty nest syndrome is more common than you may think. Many parents worry about their child and how they will cope with being away from home, while others are troubled by the idea their relationship with their partner might suffer now they're on their own again. Smoothing the transition If your child is starting student life soon, here are some of the things you can do to make the transition from being an empty nester to having a new zest for life as easy as possible: Talk to other empty nesters If your child is about to leave for university, you probably know other parents who are in the same boat. If you do, talking to them about your feelings can help you understand that you're not alone. Getting things off your chest and acknowledging how you feel can bring immediate relief too, especially if you can speak to someone who knows what you're going through. Reconnect as a couple Many parents struggle with empty nest syndrome because they feel they've lost touch with their partner over the years – and now all of a sudden it's just the 2 of them. If this happens to you, don't keep it to yourself, tell your partner how you feel. With all that extra privacy in the house you can start to rekindle your relationship and get to know one another again. Try doing things you used to do for fun before your family came along, such as having more evenings out or more weekends away. Or you could finally take that trip of a lifetime you've always dreamt of. It may feel strange when you start doing things for yourselves after decades of putting your children first, but having more quality time together should do wonders for your relationship. Take some time out Getting your child ready for university can be a busy time. Preparing them for an independent life means making sure they can cook for themselves, do their own laundry and lots more. So when the day finally comes, give yourself permission to take it easy for a week or two. Without any children to look after you can eat whatever you want, sleep in at the weekend and forget about washing and ironing. Indulge yourself – it could help you start to appreciate your new-found freedom. Delay any drastic changes Once your children have left home you may be tempted to make changes, such as moving house for instance. But while it may feel a big part of your life is coming to an end, take the time to fully adjust to your new situation before you make any major decisions. Get active Being more physically active is a great way to boost your mood as it helps your body release 'feel-good' hormones called endorphins. Try to take up active leisure pursuits that happen outdoors, as studies suggest there's a positive relationship between exposure to nature and positive mental health. If you can be moderately active for at least 150 minutes a week, you'll improve your physical health too. Try not to pester Even when you live apart you can still be close to your children. Today's technology means it's never been easier to stay in touch by phone, email, text and video chat. When your child first leaves they'll probably want to stay in touch regularly too. But it's important to give them space to adjust to their new life, so try to avoid smothering them by constantly monitoring their social media or calling them too often. While your initial outlook may be gloomy when your last child leaves, you'll soon start seeing the positives. You've done a great job raising your family, but now it's your time. Article reproduced with the kind permission of CABA, the organisation providing lifelong support to ICAEW members, ACA students and their close family around the world.

We all experience periods in life that contribute to increased stress levels and anxiousness. Be it exams, a work deadline looming, moments of uncertainty, crisis, or big life events.  However, it is how we cope through life’s ups and downs that is important. Maintaining good wellbeing is a crucial aspect of living that can help us endure and cope with periods of stress instead of floundering or struggling to cope effectively. And breathe… In moments of stress or anxiety our breathing patterns change.  You might notice your breath is shallow, out of sync or you might find yourself holding in your breath at times. This creates a vicious cycle as out of control breathing is caused by stress but also causes stress, prolonging the symptoms and making them worse. Whereas deep, controlled breathing has the opposite effect. A slow and steady inhalation and exhalation signals the parasympathetic nervous system to calm the body down. As our breathing is an automatic, unconscious, habitual function of the body, we might not even notice how we are breathing. Therefore, it is important to tune into your breath. There are countless breathing techniques which helps relax the body and mind, but the general aim is to shift from quick, shallow upper torso breathing to a slow, deep abdominal breath.  Take a minute to focus on your breathing and its pattern. Then place your hand on your stomach and strive to feel the abdomen expand and contract as you breathe in and out. Pay attention to how you feel after engaging in this breathing technique, you are sure to feel calmer. Food for thought We all know the tendency to comfort eat when feeling stressed or emotional and it can be tempting to seek out sugary, high calorie, high fat foods for instant gratification or out of sheer convenience. This response however only works in the very short term and again can aggravate our stress levels. Stress and anxiousness can create digestive and gut issues. Simple things like drinking more water to stay hydrated, reducing your caffeine intake and eating three balanced meals each day can help. Stress can leave your energy reserves depleted and low on essential vitamins and minerals.  Consume plenty of wholesome food that is rich in good nutrients.  Foods high in Vitamin C are understood to reduce anxiety levels, while green leafy vegetables and nuts are high in magnesium which can help to down-regulate our stress hormones. Rest and digest For our brain to function optimally it needs rest and this responsibility falls to the parasympathetic nervous system, also known as the rest and digest system. The parasympathetic nervous system slows our stress response by releasing hormones that relax the mind and body and is where digestion, detoxifying and healing occur. To activate the rest and digest system, there is no other option but to relax. For some that is mediation, practising yoga or indulging in some self-care.  Self-care has become a popular notion in recent years, but it is not all bubble baths and face masks. Forms of self-care can be spending time in nature, exercising, reading, journaling, colouring, tidying your surrounds or spending time with loved ones. Simply put, self-care practises are tools to help ease our response to stress and enhance our body and mind’s ability to rest, reflect and replenish. It is important to also take regular breaks throughout the day, a brief pause in momentum allows the brain space to think and process information and brings clarity that helps you feel in control and ultimately reduce stress. Get some ZZZs The power of sleep to regulate our stress levels should not be understated. Stress and anxiety can lead to sleeping problems and a lack of sleep can affect your general wellbeing – again another vicious cycle we can find ourselves in. When we are not getting enough sleep, it is more difficult to regulate our mood, emotions, and reactions.  It can affect our concentration, memory and even lead to poor decision making. It’s not always possible to get as much sleep as we would like, generally we should be aiming for at least 6 hours of sleep a night but ideally, we should aim for 7-8 hours.  To feel well rested, it is important we develop habits and routines that aid our ability to drift off. Create a healthy sleep routine by going to bed and getting up at the same time every day, avoid lie-ins and naps that can then disrupt our natural sleep cycle. Start your own personal wind-down by creating a night-time routine that you then begin to associate with sleep. It can be as simple as brushing your teeth and washing your face, developing a night-time skincare routine, reading a book, or stretching.   This is one of the harder habits to develop but try to limit your use of technology an hour before bed. Our devices keep us awake and stimulate the brain through the activity itself but also from the blue light emitted from the screen. Most phones these days have a blue light filter and can be scheduled to switch on at a certain time.

Strong social connections not only impact our mental health but our physical health too. In today’s world, we lead increasingly busy lives and often our relationships can sadly fall by the wayside. Feeling socially connected is more important than ever, especially after a long period where our social interactions are restricted, and our close circle reduced. In celebration of International Friendship Day, CA Support discuss the importance of maintaining and prioritising our relationships for our overall health. We're designed to be social We all know that comforting upbeat feeling of human connection, when you come away from a catch up with friends feeling more positive, happier, and even lighter. As a species, human beings are inherently social creatures.  We are biologically wired to seek out connection from a time where humans hunted in tribes and being part of a group was necessary for survival. Humans need closeness, connection, and a sense of unity to thrive. Social connection is one of our core psychological needs which means it plays an essential role in how safe and satisfied we feel in our lives. Social groups provide us with an important part of our identity, forming who we are and teach us a set of skills and norms that help us to function throughout life. In today’s world though we lead increasingly busy lives trying to juggle and balance work, family, and other commitments. Often our friendships can fall to the wayside. However, strong connection and belonging to something bigger than ourselves are important for our overall health and wellbeing. The benefits of connectedness should not be overlooked, and therefore as a society we should be placing greater emphasis on investing in our friendships. The more connected we feel to other people, the more enriched our life becomes. Friendship and being part of a social group offer a variety of mental health benefits. It increases our feeling of belonging, boosts our sense of purpose, and improves our self-worth and confidence. Connectiveness helps us regulate our emotions, leads to higher levels of empathy and compassion, and can even reduce our stress levels. Studies show that people who feel connected to others report lower rates of anxiety and depression. Not only does good social connection impact our psychological wellbeing, its impacts our physical health as well. Countless studies have shown a lack of human connection and feelings of loneliness are more harmful to our health than obesity, smoking and high blood pressure. By neglecting our need to connect, we put our health at risk. It can even lengthen our lives. Extensive research that looked at the lifestyles of inhabitants within Blue Zone areas, a term given to geographically regions that are home to some of the world’s oldest people, found healthy social networks and high levels of community engagement were commonalities among the differing zones. Our relationships and social groups can alter the course of our life, shape the person we are and can change our perception of ourselves and the world as well as offer an important support system.  So as you can see, social connectedness creates a positive cycle of good social, emotional and physical wellbeing. To forge happy and healthy relationships, it is very important we continually attend to and nurture our connection with the people we consider important in our lives. After an incredibly long period where our social interactions were restricted and ultimately reduced, you may find your sense of connection has diminished. Here are some ways you can improve your social health and reignite your connection with others; Reach out to a friend you may have lost touch with, remember it’s never too late to spark up an old friendship! Take time to ring or meet up with a friend you have not seen in a while. Join a new club or try out a group activity: focus in on your interests and you’ll be sure to find a club or group full of like-minded people. Volunteer: this can strengthen your sense of purpose, provides an opportunity to meet new people and give back to your community. Invite a co-worker out for lunch: now we have more freedom to socialise why not reconnect with your favourite work colleague or arrange a work group activity. Spend quality time with family: this could be planning a family BBQ, a movie night on the weekend or a family day out. Be Present: Step away from your devices when you are in company and have an uninterrupted chat. Social isolation is a challenging aspect of life to cope with and is detrimental to your health, please know the Thrive team  is here to lend a friendly ear, if and when you need it.

William is a Chartered Accountant who had his own business, but because of circumstances beyond his control he lost his business, his home and suffered with depression. CA Support have helped him throughout these difficult times, and he has given his permission for us to share his story with you. As a Chartered Accountant, I worked with a professional firm until 1985 when the entire department in which I worked was made redundant. With a partner I started my own business importing ladies fashion dresses and accessories from Hong Kong. It was very successful; the items were sold in exclusive outlets throughout the country. All went well until a supermarket chain sold identical items at a much lower price. My business partner left me with extensive business debts, so I had no choice but to sell my home. I was not aware of the Benevolent Society (CA Support) until I rang to explain why I could not pay my annual subscription fee. It was a huge relief to discover that there was support available to me. I worked hard to get my qualification and wanted to keep my membership up to date. On the initial call I explained my circumstances and it was a relief to have a friendly non-judgmental voice on the phone. There was a lot of unemployment at the time due to a severe economic downturn. To help those affected, the Benevolent Society (CA Support) hired the ballroom in the Intercontinental Hotel in Ballsbridge and asked me to address the large audience of unemployed accountants. The Institute then set up a small department to assist and offer advice to those who were unemployed. I was very glad I was able to help. I don’t know how I would have managed in the years that followed without their support. I am a very independent person, so the lack of control over my life was extremely difficult to accept. I was unable to find employment, my age went against me and I was also told that I was over-qualified. I turned to writing and had some short stories and magazines published. But the money didn’t cover a fraction of my outgoings, Unfortunately in the winter of 2013 I found myself homeless. I approached the DLR Housing Department and was initially promised accommodation but, the promise was not fulfilled. I was advised I could go into a hostel with the warning that I might have to share with a drug addict, an alcoholic or someone with mental health problems. It was only with the help of a compassionate community officer and my rector that my situation was resolved. Thankfully, I now have a home again I don’t know if I will ever forget that fearful experience, of not knowing what was going to happen to me. I still struggle to find words to express how awful it was. With assistance from CA Support I was able to go in a new direction. I continued with my writing, gave a series of public talks on the effect of suicide on those left behind and last September I gave a talk on the emotional impact of homelessness on mental health at the request of The Irish Council of Churches. For this, I could draw on my own personal experience of having been homeless. I have no doubt that there are others who have stories to tell on how CA Support has helped their lives and continue to do so. Speaking for myself, I hope that those who can will continue to support this organisation, especially now during the current Covid-19 pandemic and the uncertain future that face us all. William Blackall CA Support are supporting our members and their families always. If you would like to help or if you need help please contact us by email or on 01 637 7342 or 086 024 3294.